Holland - To Young Women - October 2005

Elder Holland has recently become a great-grandfather to a teenage girl.  He used this reality in his life as a backdrop to give advice to the Young Women of the church.  He speaks of their divinity and the love that God has for them.

• You are literally a spirit daughter of heavenly parents with a divine nature and an eternal destiny. That surpassing truth should be fixed deep in your soul and be fundamental to every decision you make as you grow into mature womanhood. There could never be a greater authentication of your dignity, your worth, your privileges, and your promise. Your Father in Heaven knows your name and knows your circumstance. He hears your prayers. He knows your hopes and dreams, including your fears and frustrations. And He knows what you can become through faith in Him. Because of this divine heritage you, along with all of your spiritual sisters and brothers, have full equality in His sight and are empowered through obedience to become a rightful heir in His eternal kingdom, an “[heir] of God, and joint-[heir] with Christ.” Seek to comprehend the significance of these doctrines. Everything Christ taught He taught to women as well as men. Indeed, in the restored light of the gospel of Jesus Christ, a woman, including a young woman, occupies a majesty all her own in the divine design of the Creator.
  

He offers advice about difficult circumstances that the Young Women will face in their lives.  He encourages them to seek to understand what God wants them to do and be rather than what the world tells them they should look like or act like.

• Be a woman of Christ. Cherish your esteemed place in the sight of God. He needs you. This Church needs you. The world needs you. A woman’s abiding trust in God and unfailing devotion to things of the Spirit have always been an anchor when the wind and the waves of life were fiercest. I say to you what the Prophet Joseph said more than 150 years ago: “If you live up to your privileges, the angels cannot be restrained from being your associates.”
  
• For you to fully claim Heavenly Father’s blessings and protection, we ask you to stay true to the standards of the gospel of Jesus Christ and not slavishly follow the whims of fads and fashions. The Church will never deny your moral agency regarding what you should wear and exactly how you should look. But the Church will always declare standards and will always teach principles. As Sister Susan Tanner taught this morning, one of those principles is modesty. In the gospel of Jesus Christ, modesty in appearance is always in fashion. Our standards are not socially negotiable.
  
  • Parents, please review this [For The Strength of Youth] booklet with your children. Second only to your love, they need your limits. Young women, choose your clothing the way you would choose your friends—in both cases choose that which improves you and would give you confidence standing in the presence of God. Good friends would never embarrass you, demean you, or exploit you. Neither should your clothing.
    
• When we come to worship the God and Father of us all and to partake of the sacrament symbolizing the Atonement of Jesus Christ, we should be as comely and respectful, as dignified and appropriate as we can be. We should be recognizable in appearance as well as in behavior that we truly are disciples of Christ, that in a spirit of worship we are meek and lowly of heart, that we truly desire the Savior’s Spirit to be with us always.

He speaks about the need for confidence.  Our Young Women are taught that they are divine daughters of our Heavenly Father who loves them.  When they lose this perspective, it can cause issues with the way they live, act, eat, and conduct their life.

• When you let people’s opinions make you self-conscious you give away your power. … The key to feeling [confident] is to always listen to your inner self—[the real you.]” And in the kingdom of God, the real you is “more precious than rubies.” Every young woman is a child of destiny and every adult woman a powerful force for good. I mention adult women because, sisters, you are our greatest examples and resource for these young women. And if you are obsessing over being a size 2, you won’t be very surprised when your daughter or the Mia Maid in your class does the same and makes herself physically ill trying to accomplish it. We should all be as fit as we can be—that’s good Word of Wisdom doctrine. That means eating right and exercising and helping our bodies function at their optimum strength. We could probably all do better in that regard. But I speak here of optimum health; there is no universal optimum size.

Elder Holland concludes by sharing an observation from a lady not of our faith.  He recognizes the blessings that can come into the lives of our Young Women when they realize who they really are.

• A woman not of our faith once wrote something to the effect that in her years of working with beautiful women she had seen several things they all had in common, and not one of them had anything to do with sizes and shapes. She said the loveliest women she had known had a glow of health, a warm personality, a love of learning, stability of character, and integrity. If we may add the sweet and gentle Spirit of the Lord carried by such a woman, then this describes the loveliness of women in any age or time, every element of which is emphasized in and attainable through the blessings of the gospel of Jesus Christ.

I was visiting with my daughter last night and we talked about some of these exact issues that Elder Holland discusses.  Our Young Women are seeking for a way to fit in, they need good friends, they are picked on for their beliefs, put down for their standards, and discouraged that the world doesn't understand the reason for their faith.  Now, more than ever, our Young Women need support, faith building moments, that will give them encouragement, strength, and peace with the decisions they are making in their lives.  Elder Holland points out that a lot of the supporty they need is in remembering that they are daughters of our Heavenly Father and that He has a plan for them to be happy.  I don't have the answers to all the problems that little girls face in life, but I do know that they are never alone and always have a Father in Heaven to turn to for comfort, peace, and hope in this crazy world.